They really do say that America is the land of opportunity. Via a Facebook post, a Baton Rouge man named Jimmy M. Payne originally joked about standing in your place in the TSA line at the airport for as little as $600. Claiming to have strong legs, a strong bladder, with zero complaints, he will hold your spot in the security line all the way until the checkpoint.

Airports are getting out of hand… so I’m offering a solution.

If you don’t feel like standing in those long TSA lines, I’ll do it for you.

I’ll stand in line, hold your spot, and call or text you when I reach the TSA scan point. You walk up, step in, and keep it moving.

Strong legs. Strong bladder. Zero complaints.

Available at MSY for $600
Available at IAH for $800
Available at ATL for $1,200

*Fees paid in advance. 2 pieces of luggage. Give me a week’s notice.

This isn’t for everybody… but if your time is worth more than your patience, you already understand.

Serious inquiries only…because I’m dead @$$!

Jimmy M. Payne
Credit: Jimmy M. Payne/Facebook

The post went viral, attracting the interest of hundreds of would-be travelers to the point where Payne said he would turn his joke into an actual business.

As we all know, a partial U.S. shutdown on February 14, 2026 resulted in federal funding for the Department of Homeland Security (DHS) being cut. Since then, TSA agents have been working for free, with an average of 10% of the workforce not reporting for duty.

At some major airports, travelers sometimes took anywhere from four to fix hours to pass through security as a result of staffing issues as the respective TSA checkpoints. Even though some passengers were able to save a lot of hassle using TSA PreCheck, the majority of those who did not have the privilege were forced to endure extremely long lines, resulting in many missing their flights.

TSA agents have been given a bit of breathing room as paychecks will be disbursed starting this week thanks to an executive order signed by President Trump. However, this is not a permanent solution as the executive order can be challenged, and Congress needs to come together to approve a spending bill to guarantee salaries being paid on time in the future.

Even then, long lines are still expected to persist for the next few weeks, and this is where Jimmy Payne wants to step in. Even though the original post offered services in New Orleans (MSY), Houston (IAH) and Atlanta (ATL), he later said logistics had to be finalized as TSA officials could potentially push back if the service ends up being disruptive.

There doesn’t seem to be any guidelines restricting this type of behavior as it is happening before the checkpoint, but Payne said he is in discussions with various airports to make sure his operation is vetted before he starts officially taking offers.

Even though agents will receive their salaries starting in the next few days, Payne’s service may still be worthwhile for those who value convenience as security line wait times won’t magically go back to normal overnight. Reports indicate that close to 500 officers have resigned over the six-week period, requiring some time before checkpoint staffing can be adequately ramped up. Even there, there is the risk that the executive order could be challenged, potentially resulting in payments being paused yet again.

Payne hasn’t published a finalized price list, but if his original figures are anything to go by, it’s definitely not a cheap service. However, as evidenced by the overwhelming number of responses, many people clearly value convenience over savings, and would much prefer to pay to walk up to the start of the line closer to their flight time rather than standing many hours snaking their way to the front.

Sign up for the free Gate Checked newsletter here sent three times weekly.
Google Add as preferred source on Google WhatsApp Follow on WhatsApp